When I first heard the title Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982, I initially thought it might be a Korean movie. After coming across some intriguing clips from the film, I became curious. Later, I discovered that the movie was actually an adaptation of this novel, which made me eager to read it.
Written in simple yet impactful language, Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 is a compelling and deeply relatable story that I finished in just three days. It is a novel that doesn’t exaggerate or dramatize; instead, it lays bare the quiet yet persistent realities of gender inequality. Through the life of an "ordinary" woman, Cho Nam-joo masterfully captures the struggles faced by countless women, particularly in Asian societies, using real statistical data from South Korea to highlight the vulnerability and systemic oppression women endure.
At its core, the novel tells the life story of Kim Jiyoung, an average woman born at the end of the 20th century. From childhood to adulthood, she experiences discrimination so ingrained in society that it often goes unnoticed.
Kim Jiyoung is a girl born to a mother whose in-laws wanted a son. Kim Jiyoung is a sister who shares a room while her brother gets one of his own. Kim Jiyoung is a student preyed upon by male teachers. Kim Jiyoung is a daughter whose father blames her for being harassed at night. Kim Jiyoung is a hardworking employee overlooked for promotions. Kim Jiyoung is a wife who sacrifices her career and independence for a life of domesticity.
All these experiences pile up, leading to her emotional breakdown. As the novel progresses, we realize that her story is being narrated by a psychologist—who, through treating her, begins to understand his own wife’s sacrifices and struggles.
The Uncomfortable Truths:
One of the most striking aspects of the novel is how it highlights the normalization of gender bias. Several moments in the story feel particularly unsettling because they reflect realities that many women silently endure.
Kim Jiyoung's father, despite contributing little, takes pride in his children’s success and considers himself responsible for their well-being. Yet, even when praising them, he introduces his daughters by their professions—“one is a teacher, the other a university student”—but refers to his son simply as “the son,” as if that in itself is an achievement.
When Jiyoung is harassed on a bus, instead of supporting her, her father blames her for being out late. His attitude is shaped by her grandmother, who cherishes only her grandson and his accomplishments.
After Jiyoung’s breakup with her first boyfriend, neighbours automatically assume she must have been at fault—perhaps she cheated—while her ex-boyfriend's character remains unquestioned.
While commuting to work during pregnancy, she overhears a woman commenting that if she can't handle it, she shouldn't have gotten pregnant—a sentiment frequently echoed in public spaces, reinforcing the idea that a woman’s struggles are always her own responsibility.
Even in a coffee shop, where Jiyoung simply enjoys her own company, people gossip that she must be spending her husband's hard-earned money, disregarding the sacrifices she has made and the emotional toll of her choices.
The novel also exposes workplace sexism through an incident where Jiyoung’s colleagues leak private photos of a female co-worker. Instead of holding them accountable, the office head excuses their actions, claiming it could “ruin their families,” once again prioritizing male privilege over justice. This is best summed up by the line:
"While offenders were in fear of losing a small part of their privilege, the victims were running the risk of losing everything."
A Character Who Stood Her Ground:
Among the novel’s characters, Eunyoung, Jiyoung’s sister, stands out as a strong and opinionated figure. She openly challenges the gender discrimination within their family, inspiring Jiyoung to question the norms she has always accepted. Her presence in the novel serves as a beacon of hope—proof that resistance, no matter how small, can make a difference.
The second woman who stood her ground was Eunsil, Jiyoung's office leader. She was the only female in the office to reach such a high position, and despite the constant gossip about her balancing work and motherhood; people whispering about her continuing to work even after having children she never let their words affect her. Eunsil was a strong advocate for women in the workplace. She openly opposed office dinners, which often led to harassment, and took a firm stand against inappropriate behaviour in such settings. Unlike many others, she consistently recognized Jiyoung’s hard work and encouraged female employees to pursue their careers even after marriage, challenging the expectation that women should sacrifice their professional aspirations for family life.
Final Thoughts:
Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 is not just a novel—it’s a mirror held up to reality. It compels readers to confront the ingrained biases that shape women's lives, not through dramatic twists or exaggeration, but through unfiltered truths that resonate because they are real. The novel captures the invisible pressures, societal expectations, and daily struggles that women endure, making each page a stark reflection of lived experiences. It is a must-read for all, regardless of age or gender, as it challenges us to acknowledge these realities and rethink the world we live in.
Quotes from the novel:
- The world had changed a great deal, but the little rules, contracts and customs had not, which meant the world hadn't actually changed at all.
- I don’t know if I’m going to get married or have children. Or maybe I’ll die before I get to do any of that. Why do I have to deny myself something I want right now to prepare for a future that may or may not come?
- What do you want from us? The dumb girls are too dumb, the smart girls are too smart, and the average girls are too unexceptional?
- While offenders were in fear of losing a small part of their privilege, the victims were running the risk of losing everything.
- Jiyoung grew up being told to be cautious, to dress conservatively, to be “ladylike.” That it’s your job to avoid dangerous places, times of day and people. It’s your fault for not noticing and not avoiding.
- People who pop a painkiller at the smallest hint of a migraine, or who need anaesthetic cream to remove a mole, demand that women giving birth should gladly endure the pain, exhaustion, and mortal fear. As if that’s maternal love. This idea of “maternal love” is spreading like religious dogma. Accept Maternal Love as your Lord and Savior, for the Kingdom is near!
- Some demeaned it as “bumming around at home,” while others glorified it as “work that sustains life,” but none tried to calculate its monetary value. Probably because the moment you put a price on something, someone has to pay.
- Even the usually reasonable, sane ones verbally degrade women—even the women they have feelings for.
- Her career potential and areas of interest were being limited just because she had a baby
